Three Koreans Walk into a Bar…

Uh, actually, the bar is called “America,” and they come out with the Americanized and/or married last names Joe (was Cho), Ericksen, and Bolinger. Not really a joke, just taking a look at the family tree.

Another truck was in the lot this morning. I crossed over to walk on the opposite side of the “street” that runs through there, and he drove off. Guys, I’m sorry if I’m assuming the worst about you, but I can’t help thinking this driving-off-after-being-ignored means you’re either trying to pick up prostitutes or otherwise have bad things in mind.

The husband and I were having an animated discussion about an issue last night, and he said I had “crazy hippie ideas” about a particular aspect (no worries, it wasn’t at all “me man, me right”). Dear, you married a woman who didn’t change her name, went to Oberlin, lived in a co-op, composts, uses a Keeper, and taught you the phrase, “If it’s yellow…” I mean, really. LOL.

Just my random thoughts for the morning. I’m sure we’ll return to more serious fare soon enough.

Why I’m Not Feeling Charitable This Morning

Dear Semi Truck Driver:

Yes, I heard you shouting, “Ma’am! Hey, Ma’am!” at me, and I deliberately did not stop. My woman-walking-alone spidey senses started tingling long before, as soon as I saw you pulled over in the parking lot for no apparent purpose - that’s why I took a wide path away from your cab door in the first place.

Look, I was just taking my 10-minute walk across a deserted lot to try to catch the bus so I don’t get run over by the alternate - walking down the road from my house with the blind hill that has no sidewalks. For a second, I almost stopped - what if you needed help? My grandfather was a truck driver - what would he say? Something in my lizard brain, however, insisted: “Keep walking. Keep walking. Don’t even look.”

I started thinking about all the ways girls and women are conditioned to be “nice” and “helpful” and how that can put them in some pretty vulnerable positions. And I noticed that as soon as I reached the end of the lot, you pulled off and went away with no problems.

This morning’s encounter was rather unsettling. While waiting for the bus, after the first truck pulled out, I noticed another pull in - again, for no apparent reason, not to park and rest, and in a lot that is not there for this purpose. There are many more women walking alone through this area now that our neighborhood bus route has been eliminated, and I really, really hope that this is not connected to the sudden appearance of truck drivers hanging out and shouting at women. I worry about my bus stop friend with her beginner’s English and whether she would stop for them to try to understand what they’re saying. I wonder if I should scrape the rust off my Spanish to knock on her door and warn her, or if this is a paranoid and supremely weird thing to do.

Eh. Here’s a song to go with:
(Edited to add: NSFW lyrics in the song)

When Physicians Talk About Hysterectomy (It’s Cringe-Inducing)

Head on over to the Our Bodies Ourselves blog to find out why I found letters between a couple of male ob/gyns regarding hysterectomy kind of cringe-worthy.

Hint: I’m pretty sure a car and a vagina are not the same thing.

Her Name was Esmin Green

Esmin Green sang gospel music at church. Esmin Green was a mother with six children. Esmin Green was a black woman who died on the floor of one of New York City’s public hospitals while waiting for psychiatric care and being ignored.

No, it’s not the first time somebody has died waiting for treatment in a hospital emergency department, but it should serve as a wake-up call for those not paying attention. Esmin Green collapsed on the floor after waiting almost a full day to be seen. Nobody noticed for half an hour, and that person just walked away. Another staff member, instead of bending down and saying, “Ma’am, ma’am,” instead of talking to her or touching her like she was a human being, prodded her with a foot.

Her patient record contains absolute falsehoods, documentation that she went to the bathroom, that she was sitting quietly, when videotape clearly shows that she was already collapsed on the floor.

Part of the Kings County Hospital Center’s response strategy will be to check in on patients more frequently and document those checks. How well can such documentation be trusted when documentation on Esmin Green contained outright lies?

How many people weren’t satisfied by reading accounts of this event, and just had to watch the video themselves out of morbid curiosity, not out of compassion for Esmin Green?

The public reaction hasn’t always been any better than Kings County’s care in this case. I have seen comments asking where her family was, asking why she didn’t just leave, why other people who were not healthcare providers and were also waiting for psychiatric care didn’t help her - comments that put the blame on her and everyone but the responsible system and parties for dying on the floor, alone. Reports say that Esmin Green was involuntarily admitted in the first place - the hospital determined that she was in need of care, and should not leave without receiving it, they just hadn’t provided any. Frankly, how much of an asshole do you have to be to say that someone waiting in an emergency department for psychiatric care should have been the one to control the situation? How much of an asshole do you have to be to see video of someone dying on the floor in a public area and being ignored and to not see that something went seriously wrong with the people and system who were supposed to be providing her with care?

What if Esmin Green wasn’t a poor woman? A black woman? A woman with mental health problems? A woman who needed to use the public hospitals, which should not be providing substandard care just because they serve poor/black/mentally ill people? If I asked you, “Where do you think this is more likely to happen - the private hospital in a good part of town, or the public hospital that takes everybody?” what would you say? And why would that answer ever be appropriate? Is this the best we can do for our fellow Americans? Or is it just the best we’re willing to do?

Ask yourself: If your white, male Mayor or city council members or university president collapsed on the floor of a hospital, would he have been ignored? Would poking him with a shoe have been an adequate assessment technique? Or would a team of people have swooped in to save the day (and the life)? Would our hypothetical person of privilege have waited for care for nearly a day in the first place, and if not, is that an appropriate way to dole out healthcare? Yes, the healthcare system is broken. But it’s a hell of a lot more broken for some people than for others.

Important Related Posts:
More information from the New York ACLU
Esmin Green…Yes, She Mattered - Womanist Musings
Esmin Green - Dies B/c She Does Not Count - WOC PhD
“Flesh that needs to be loved”…. more thoughts on Esmin Green - harrietsdaughter at Don’t Do That

PS-Sometimes when I find something completely outrageous and horrifying, it takes me a while to write the related post. I want to get it right, not get it fast.

Reminder: Fireworks are Best Left to Professionals

Says the girl who once had a hole melted in her bra (which she was wearing at the time) after contact with an errant bottle rocket.

I’m going to tell you this story every year, even though it didn’t result in serious injury. I’ve always been a little bit afraid of backyard fireworks, especially when people have been drinking, and I plan to continue being an embarrassing fraidy cat about them. Did you know that sparklers can reach 1800 degrees? And that ~6,300 people went to U.S. emergency departments around the holiday last year for firework-related injuries?

Be careful, and have a great holiday!

“The Dental Floss of Feminine Fitness”

You’re just going to have to go over to the OBOS blog to find out what I’m talking about.

Hint: This is totally going to be more vagina talk.

Wednesday Grab Bag: Gym for Your Vagina, History of Vibrators, Rape Kit Backlog, and Home Birth

From the New York Times, more reduction of women to individual parts (that apparently need “improvement”: A Spa for Those Women Concerned About ‘Pelvic Fitness’

“There is good data to suggest if you floss regularly, it reduces gingivitis down the road,” said Dr. Erin E. Tracy, a gynecologist who is an assistant professor in obstetrics, gynecology and reproductive biology at the Harvard Medical School. But there is no evidence to suggest that a young woman who starts doing Kegel exercises will decrease her chances of pelvic problems later in life, she said.

From The Times of London: The history of vibrators

From the LA Times:Lost promise for rape victims

“The National Institute of Justice estimates that at least 400,000 rape kits are sitting untested in police stations and crime labs across the country. In the city of Los Angeles alone, more than 7,000 sit in refrigerated storage in a city warehouse facility and a trailer behind police headquarters.”

On Babble: My Illegal Home Birth

From the Baltimore City Paper: Home Made: Inside Baltimore’s Home-Birth Underground

PS-Why didn’t anybody tell me that I have toothpaste on my shirt? You know I can’t see it if it lands lower than the boobs.

UNFPA Funds Withheld Again

At Our Bodies Our Blog today, UNFPA Funds Withheld Again.

A Fancy Way Of Saying That Abused Wives Were Asking For It

“…women desire to have their own way instead of submitting to their husbands because of sin. And husbands on their parts, because they’re sinners, now respond to that threat to their authority either by being abusive, which is of course one of the ways men can respond when their authority is challenged…”

Apparently when the womenfolk are all uppity, there are two ways a man can respond - “through ruling that is abusive and oppressive–and of course we all know the horrors of that and the ugliness of that”…. or by becoming completely passive, saying, “‘OK dear,’ ‘Whatever you say dear,’ ‘Fine dear’” Apparently there is no in between.

Now, I don’t think the speaker in question was advocating spousal abuse, exactly, but there sure does seem to be an undertone of “she was asking for it” in there, doesn’t there? With a side of “men will be men.” Argh.

Just read it.

ob Tampons Selling an Environmental Approach to Your Period

Last night, I saw a commercial for ob tampons that, to me, was clearly suggesting through both words and imagery that the ob product is more environmentally friendly than other popular tampon brands. Indeed, they have a “mighty. small.” campaign going that emphasizes the lack of an applicator and so less waste for disposal.

One section of the campaign website includes tips for greener living, which assume a target audience of adult women with disposable income by including tips for wrapping your water heater in an insulating blanket, taking a reusable water bottle to the gym instead of buying bottled, and online bill paying. They’re even holding a contest for adult U.S. women in which the grand prize is a Toyota Prius.

To be clear, I’m not endorsing ob, although I think it’s something to watch for a mainstream tampon maker to be specifically addressing environmental issues. Seventh Generation and Natracare have been doing this for years, and more explicitly, although those might have been considered to have a more “fringe” audience. The campaign does seem a bit like something we’ve seen a million times before - urban white women with money buy their environmental street cred, ignoring young women and other audiences. The menstruation focus, though, is something I haven’t seen before on television and outside of the companies mentioned above for the already aware.

Of course, an even more environmentally friendly option for women would be products such as reusable cloth pads, the Keeper or Diva Cup, but smarter choices can be made in tampon-land. This may be the first time in my lifetime that I’ve seen menstrual products sold on television with a “green” message, and it will be interesting to see if it causes some women to start thinking more about the amount of lifetime waste associated with menstrual products.